It goes to say that we definitely enjoy exploring caves (on well lit trails, with water fountains and restrooms at the bottom and not too many stairs). Jewel Cave bills itself as the "longest cave system in the world" and is situated in the glorious Black Hills of South Dakota. After visiting Devils Tower (more on that in a different post), we decided that the easy drive down to Jewel Cave would be the perfect cap to an already perfect day. Then we saw this:
We're going into the cave!!
Worst.Tour.Ever.
Perhaps we made the mistake of going on the Discovery Tour (Which should be named "The Up and Down in the Elevator Tour" instead), but this was perhaps the worst NPS site we had visited to date. The leftovers in my refrigerator looked more mysterious than where the elevator let us off at. After a "tour" of 15 minutes, which consisted of standing on dirt in a room that had one (ONE!!) piece of crystallization in it, it was time to come back up.
Wait....What??? Did you just turn away like...2 dozen people at the top telling them that the tour was full??? Did those same people walk away in frustration and even with some children crying?? Is that IT motherfu....well, you know the rest.
Disappointment is a bitter pill to swallow. Jewel Cave should definitely take a lesson or two from its amazing side cave experience, Wind Cave National Park, just 45 minutes away and give something, ANYTHING back to the visitors. After experiencing a drive thru rendition of Cormac McCarthy's "The Road" outside, we didn't think anything could be more depressing.
We were sadly mistaken.
But did you SEE the bitchin stamp???
Jewel Cave National Monument - 1/10
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