Side Dish: A Capitol Offense - Another Day, Another Obsession

If the ability to go back in time ever becomes a reality, one of the first things I shall do is travel back to that picture-perfect day at the Quarai Ruins in New Mexico's Salinas Pueblo Missions National Monument. Take a moment to gaze at the crystal blue sky, breathe in the crisp mountain air and.........

.....punch that old man square in the nose.

A previous entry told of our fateful meeting with another pair of Stampers at the Quarai ruins, to which the man excitedly ran back to his car asking if we "collected capitols". Waving a small bound blue book innocently around, we were at once capitivated at another chance to stamp something else. What a neat little side trip to each capitol this would be....think of the fun.

*!!$?&*#$%@
This little blue book, in only 5 states, has caused us more pain, laughter, screaming, and lying than a waterboarding session with Dick Cheney himself. We have had the fortune of traveling a great deal in our 11 years of marriage, and had we started earlier, we would currently have 22 stamps.

And would most likely be divorced.

The story behind "The Capitol Collection" starts in a small neighborhood very close to our home, in Capitol Hill, a neighborhood directly behind the Denver Capitol building. An enterprising soul decided to send each state capitol building a stamp with distinguishing state landmarks, the name of the capital city, and a picture of the Capitol building itself. Some states were reluctant to participate, with some flat out refusing (Tennessee being one....shame, as Nashville not only has the Capitol building, but a U.S. President's grave on its summit as well). Each stamp would be conveniently placed at the visitor desk of each location, where a kindly docent or volunteer would recognize the traveler's request immediately and point the stamp out to the stamper's delight.

Each state has a picture of the building itself for easy identification, and on the opposite page, a description of the construction and history of the Capitol, along with a small area at the bottom to record each visit, much like the NPS Passport Stamp.

Capitols do have volunteers that guide visitors through the grounds, describing much of what is written above. How wonderful that these people give their valuable time to educate the public on what their tax dollars pay for, and showing the inner workings of state government.

And their average age is approximately 97 years old.

In only one location visited has the stamp been available where it is supposed to have been. The volunteers have looked at us like we were crazy (yes), obsessive (dead-on) and pathetic (hey!!) while searching aimlessly in every drawer in or around the visitor desk. Due to the tours normally happening every hour on the hour, this pursuit can put a crimp in travel plans if you are planning on a flyby. For the extremely dedicated traveler, a 2-hour visit can be the norm in settings that are alarmingly similar in every building.

Wyoming - the lovely building seen above, located in downtown Cheyenne, is located at the end of a street housing all of the public buildings within the vicinity. However - no stamp is to be found anywhere near the building. Come again???

Wyoming's stamp is found at the History Museum across the street, where a myriad of retirees sit waiting for someone, anyone, to visit them during the day. We finally located the building...asked the volunteer, who shockingly knew immediately. She sweetly asked us, "Would you be interested in taking a tour with me in the museum?"

Oh no......this will take at least 90 minutes. We are 300 miles from Fossil Butte National Monument (the actual destination for the day). What to do with this sweet old lady?? Lie your asses off and watch her face drop like the stroke she might have had the month before.

We told her that we had already visited the museum. "How about the new exhibit? Want to see that?" Yeah -we told her we had already seen that, too. She looked puzzled and we literally RAN out of the building. Interesting start to the new stamp book. Easily located, but with an engraved seat in hell reserved for both of us.

Utah nearly ended the pursuit of collection before it began. A beautiful white marble building was almost completely empty (never a good sign). We had our instructions for the stamp's location and came in with book in hand. The visitors desk was unmanned, and the stamp was nowhere in sight. We decided we would become Sherlock Holmes' apprentices and started opening every single drawer, door, and office that we could get into looking for a stamp that most likely did not exist. Our blood pressure started to rise as we walked through the building, crossing each and every entrance without finding a soul who knew what we were speaking of.

While collecting NPS stamps, the avid Stamper can always count on the coveted stamp to be available at either the ranger desk, the bookstore, or by the entrance. 100% of the time, it is there waiting for greedy hands to grab it and feed their OCD obsession. This was a different ballgame. After driving 400 miles to stamp something, DAMMIT, it needs to be there.

We got back in the car, and Matt immediately threw the book in the garbage. Matt stated that if this was going to be like this in each location, it was not ultimately worth it. That affirmation lasted approximately 30 seconds. Across the street from the Capitol, was a gift shop and bookstore. It was worth a shot to see if they knew anything. I walked in, and asked the 15 year old checker if he had seen or heard of the elusive Capitol Stamp. A vacant look appeared, alerting me that we were not going to be successful. I left the building deflated, and then heard someone scream, "Ma'am!! Ma'am!! I think I found it!" Running back inside, the Doogie Howser lookalike had indeed located it. The book was retrieved from the trash and the quest was back on.

Similar stories followed....In our own Capitol, we found the docent who knew where the stamp was, only to realize to our horror that we (Brooke) left the book itself in the car. In Nebraska, we waited over an hour, as we had just missed the last tour sitting on the cold marble, crabbing the entire time.

The lone exception was the wonderful state of New Mexico. Santa Fe is a home away from home for the Cales and it never fails to disappoint. The Capitol visit was the most interesting of the buildings we had visited. The stamp was where it was reported to be, and the art around the Rotunda was worth the visit itself. New Mexico - we thank you for saving our sanity this day...

We are most certainly sadists, as we do intend to continue this mad game as our travels roll on. Trips to Pierre, Bismarck, Boise, and Topeka are in the near future, and we will roll in to each Capitol building hoping for the best, but knowing the worst will befall us. We will break laws, go into vacant offices, bypass security offices, and lie to anyone that crosses our path to obtain each stamp.....

But if H.G. Wells' grandson ever does invent a time machine??? That old man is dead meat.......